You probably know this popular phrase:
“If you want to make change you have to leave your comfort zone.”
This is what we repeat all over and again.Im my opinion thoughtlessly. Yes – thoughtlessly. Just think. What kind of comfort is to be stuck at work you do not even like? You are there because you are afraid of paying your bills. You are afraid that you would not find something really exciting. You have got this rotten stability. You are afraid of the prestige or company car you can lose. What kind of comfort is to be stuck in relationships where there are no sincere feelings. And you are there because you feel guilty or call of duty. And you call it sense of security. What kind of comfort is to be independent single person when, in depth, you are scared of closeness and openness?
COMFORT – is synonym of good feeling, light, pleasure, is not it?
Here so called “comfort” is a sphere where you feel bad, look for excuses , rationalize, theories. You wait for something , but you do not know for what exactly. A KIND OF COMFORT- SITTING ON THE CHAIR THAT IS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN. And sometimes something just whispers (or shouts) : you lie, you lie, you cheat yourself. But, very often, you keep on cheating, pushing it away, and pretending all is ok.
What if you call that FEAR ZONE?
Or stronger. Zone of self delusion, zone of excuses, zone of insincerity. What if you call the fear- just THE LACK OF INFORMATION. Lack of information about yourself, what I really want, who I am. Lack of information – what is that can change your life. It is lighter, is not it? Because you can always look for information. And if you look for information, take different perspective, then you open your mind and soul to new solutions. We are stuck in this fear zone and self delusion, not because we are afraid of new and unknown. We stay there because we know it well, even if it pains. But we know the pain, it is predictable for us.
And how does the move towards leaving the zone start?
It starts when you start calling things by name. You notice that safety, independence, comfort is your self delusion. And call it by names. It starts when you stop believing and convincing yourself that all is ok, that this is the life, that you should do it on behalf of good, you do not belief your reasoning. Well sometime this self delusion can last years and decades. So, it may be fearful to leave the zone. But, what do you feel later on? Can you remind such situation? Go back to such decisions. Go back to the moments when something grew, rose in you. Something like water pushing on the glass surface with enormous power. More and more, irrevocably, no way back, already out of your control. And then cruuush, break. And after that break, after the crash , you felt as if you regained yourself, with new breath, new power, clarity. Do you remember such situations?